An early morning gospel reflection

I’m not one who can go day after day on little sleep. My father can. My older brother can. I think both of them get by on about 6 hours of sleep a night. I can’t do that. A couple of weeks ago, I was up late on both Friday and Saturday and was up early the following mornings. By Sunday morning I was exhausted and felt terrible. I peeled myself out of bed, labored to get ready for the day, and ended up feeling so awful that I laid down on the couch.

I fell asleep immediately (which is a dangerous thing for me to do on a Sunday morning – picture a pastor coming in late for church with bed head because he was napping on the couch). Providentially I was awakened by a fly after just a few minutes. And as I was mustering the strength I needed to get going, I looked out the window and saw the sun rising just over the horizon.

This was God’s kindness to me. Not because of the beauty of the sunrise (which it was stunning), but the visual reminder of God’s mercy. I was reminded of the wretchedness of this world and how we deserve the pouring out of God’s fierce wrath on us. We did not deserve another day of God’s loving kindness. Yet, there I was, tired and somewhat haggard, and still a beneficiary of God’s mercy along with six and a half billion others.

On a more personal level, I also thought of God’s direct grace and mercy to my life. You have to understand my Sunday morning struggles. I am very aware of my short comings, sins, and inadequacies; yet I have the heavy responsibility to shepherd the people who gather at my church and passionately unpack God’s truth’s to them each Sunday. And as I was weary and feeling (yet again) so unable and unworthy to do such a task, reflecting on my sinful heart and my obvious lack of gift and ability, there was the rising sun.

As the sun was reminding me of God’s mercy, my mind was led to Lamentations – “The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; His mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” My sins, which are many, are serious and should be dealt with as I confess them and turn from them in repentance. But God does not accept me on the basis of my goodness. I am accepted purely by the righteousness of Jesus Christ that has been credited to me by faith. And so, when I stand up to proclaim the Word of God, my confidence is in Christ, not my goodness.

It was a good day. All because of the great love of God poured out on me because I am acceptable to Him through Jesus Christ.

When Satan tempts me to despair,
And tells me of the guilt within,
Upward I look and see Him there
Who made an end of all my sin.
Because the sinless Savior died,
My sinful soul is counted free,
For God, the Just, is satisfied
To look on Him and pardon me,
To look on Him and pardon me.